“While our cultural values continue to elevate marriage, our behavior drifts away from it. We’re a nation obsessed with marriage. The problem is that we may not know how to make marriage work” (Alex Kotlowitz).
To help us to “make marriage work,” we will share this week and next, 8 myths of married love and ways to dispel their falsehood. To do this we’ll be sharing parts of an article title, “Myths and True Meaning of Married Love” written by Michael McManus (the founder of Marriage Savers, www.marriagesavers.org), which is posted on the Smartmarriages.com web site in the Archives section.
At the end of each of McManus’ points we’re adding additional comments, scriptures and discussion questions, hoping you’ll use them to spend “Intentional Time” with your spouse going over them.
“MYTH 1: THE PURPOSE OF MARRIAGE IS OUR PERSONAL HAPPINESS. However, if so, when there are inevitable disappointments, and crosses to bear, the conclusion must be, ‘Either marriage is not fulfilling its promise, or something is wrong with me.’
“Dr Glenn Knecht, of Fourth Presbyterian Church in Bethesda says, ‘The true goal of marriage is not happiness but oneness. Jesus taught, ‘So they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no man separate.’ Happiness is a by-product. However, seeking oneness is costly. It involves sacrifice of the ego, so human pride is crushed until it has no life of its own anymore.’”
- Comment on Dr Knecht’s statement on the true goal of marriage.
- Do you agree that “oneness” in marriage is difficult and can be costly? Explain.
- Does this “oneness” mean you can’t have individuality within your marriage? [Read more →]






