Comments on: Changing the Sexually Abusive Mind – Marriage Message #37 http://www.marriagemissions.com/changing-the-sexually-abusive-mind-marriage-message-37/ a Christian Marriage Website Thu, 11 Mar 2010 15:14:43 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Anthony http://www.marriagemissions.com/changing-the-sexually-abusive-mind-marriage-message-37/comment-page-1/#comment-3404 Anthony Mon, 20 Apr 2009 16:27:39 +0000 http://marriagemissions.net/2007/07/21/past-sexual-abuse-marriage-message-37/#comment-3404 Great message... this can be applied to any addiction... Thank you! Great message… this can be applied to any addiction… Thank you!

]]> By: Denise http://www.marriagemissions.com/changing-the-sexually-abusive-mind-marriage-message-37/comment-page-1/#comment-1785 Denise Wed, 17 Sep 2008 00:21:26 +0000 http://marriagemissions.net/2007/07/21/past-sexual-abuse-marriage-message-37/#comment-1785 (UNITED STATES)  How can I explain to my husband the reason why I can sometimes be intimate (very rarely) and most times I can't. I am only intimate when he brings up the fact that he wants me to be more open sexually. I then tell him that I need for him to help me. And he does for that moment. And he thinks it's all better then, and it's not, until he brings it up again. He already knows what happened in my past and the reason I hold back when it comes to sex. But he doesn't understand. So can someone please give me some pointers on how I can get him to help me without him knowing? Thanks, Denise (UNITED STATES)  How can I explain to my husband the reason why I can sometimes be intimate (very rarely) and most times I can’t. I am only intimate when he brings up the fact that he wants me to be more open sexually. I then tell him that I need for him to help me. And he does for that moment. And he thinks it’s all better then, and it’s not, until he brings it up again. He already knows what happened in my past and the reason I hold back when it comes to sex. But he doesn’t understand. So can someone please give me some pointers on how I can get him to help me without him knowing? Thanks, Denise

]]> By: LYNNE http://www.marriagemissions.com/changing-the-sexually-abusive-mind-marriage-message-37/comment-page-1/#comment-880 LYNNE Mon, 12 May 2008 15:32:01 +0000 http://marriagemissions.net/2007/07/21/past-sexual-abuse-marriage-message-37/#comment-880 (USA) KJ, Honey have you ever had any victim's counseling? You are well worth living for your own life, not just your children. What happened to you was not your fault. What is happening to you is not your fault. I was abused as a young child as well and I often have many hard times when it comes to being physically intimate. My husband had a very hard time dealing with this too and at one point he didn't listen when I said "no" either. Do not tolerate this form of disrespect because it keeps you from healing. Go and speak with your pastor or a Christian counselor. GOD will heal your heart and you can enjoy physical intimacy again but you have to learn to heal first. Please don't say that you don't fit. GOD loves you and you are his child You definitely fit. Your children need you and GOD has a plan for you. It sounds like both you and your husband would benefit from talking with someone. You need to face what happened to you and he needs to face what is causing him to do what he's doing. I love ya girl. Don't lose hope. Pray to God to heal you and set an appointment with a counselor. I'll be praying for you. Love, Lynne (USA) KJ, Honey have you ever had any victim’s counseling? You are well worth living for your own life, not just your children. What happened to you was not your fault. What is happening to you is not your fault. I was abused as a young child as well and I often have many hard times when it comes to being physically intimate. My husband had a very hard time dealing with this too and at one point he didn’t listen when I said "no" either. Do not tolerate this form of disrespect because it keeps you from healing.

Go and speak with your pastor or a Christian counselor. GOD will heal your heart and you can enjoy physical intimacy again but you have to learn to heal first. Please don’t say that you don’t fit. GOD loves you and you are his child You definitely fit. Your children need you and GOD has a plan for you. It sounds like both you and your husband would benefit from talking with someone. You need to face what happened to you and he needs to face what is causing him to do what he’s doing. I love ya girl. Don’t lose hope. Pray to God to heal you and set an appointment with a counselor. I’ll be praying for you. Love, Lynne

]]> By: KJ http://www.marriagemissions.com/changing-the-sexually-abusive-mind-marriage-message-37/comment-page-1/#comment-873 KJ Mon, 12 May 2008 04:56:27 +0000 http://marriagemissions.net/2007/07/21/past-sexual-abuse-marriage-message-37/#comment-873 (USA) This all sounds wonderful, but what do you do when your husband picks up right where the abusers left off -- when your "no" means nothing to the one who is supposed to love and cherish and care for you? What happens when you'd rather die than have him touch you one more time and he knows that but continues anyway? What happens when my children are no longer enough reason to continue to live? What happens when you have gone to church all your life, studied the Bible diligently, raised your children to know and love their Savior and Lord, and still find that you don't fit anywhere because of what has happened and continues to happen? What do I do then? KJ (USA) This all sounds wonderful, but what do you do when your husband picks up right where the abusers left off — when your “no” means nothing to the one who is supposed to love and cherish and care for you? What happens when you’d rather die than have him touch you one more time and he knows that but continues anyway? What happens when my children are no longer enough reason to continue to live? What happens when you have gone to church all your life, studied the Bible diligently, raised your children to know and love their Savior and Lord, and still find that you don’t fit anywhere because of what has happened and continues to happen? What do I do then? KJ

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