The following and web site links and descriptions of various resources that will help newlyweds. We pray you will find that they minister to your marriage.

• www.familylife.com This the web site for the ministry of Family Life Today. This is a great ministry and they have a great web site that you could find very helpful. In particular, if you go into their web site and click into “Articles” and then select “Marriage” you will find an option you can select called “Early Marriage.” There you will find a long list of articles you can choose from which you can read.

• www.family.org This is the web site for the great ministry of Focus on the Family. One of the many features of this web site can be found when you place your cursor over the top bar that says “Relationship and Marriage.” A drop-down box will show up and you can select “The First Five Years” to read a number of articles.

• www.realrelationships.com This is the web site for Dr Les and Dr Leslie Parrott who are a husband-and-wife team who not only share the same name, but the same passion for helping others build healthy relationships. In 1991, the Parrotts founded the Center for Relationship Development on the campus of Seattle Pacific University — a groundbreaking program dedicated to teaching the basics of good relationships. Their web site has free videos that you can view on your computer which gives relationship advice on many different subjects you will deal with in your married lives together. We highly advise that you visit their web site to see what they can offer you

RESOURCES DESCRIPTIONS:

• FOR BETTER, FOR WORSE -Compiled and edited by Marlene Bagnull, published by Christian Publications, www.christianpublications.com. A wonderfully, interesting book filled with real stories with the collective wisdom from over 100 real people who have had years of experience making their marriages work. Through their stories you’ll see how to live out your wedding-day promises. The editor takes the different aspects of the wedding vows (such as: “To Have and to Hold, For better or Worse, For Richer, for Poorer, In Sickness and Health, Forsaking All Others, To Love and to Cherish, and Till Death Do Us Part”) and has within these chapters, numerous true testimonials related to each one. This book will inspire you with hear-stirring reminders that even in the hard times new depths of married love can be discovered when we look to the Author of Love Himself. What a treasure this book is to read!

• GREAT EXPECTATIONS -by Toben and Joanne Heim, published by NavPress, www.navpress.com. This workbook will help you, whether you’re newly engaged or newly married, to build a foundation of understanding that will last a lifetime. It helps you to talk about the expectations you have over a variety of subjects that will inevitably come up within marriage. While you may imagine big family dinners on sunday afternoons, your spouse may be looking forward to football and pizza on the couch.

So how do you resolve how to spend your Sunday afternoons and rest of your life together? They key is to examine your expectations for all different aspects of marriage and talk about them with your spouse (or spouse-to-be). They deal with issues like money, family history, sex, spirituality, and more. This fun, interactive book is packed with honest anecdotes, intriguing questions, and exercises designed to help you understand and appreciate what makes your spouse different—and special.

• HAPPILY EVER AFTER -by Toben and Joanne Heim, published by Kregel Publications, a division of Kregel, Inc., P.O. Box 2607, Grand Rapids, MI 49501. This book is divided into 8 chapters – each one dealing with an area of marriage that can be a source of unmet expectations during the first year (particularly for those living in the U.S.A.). In each chapter of Happily Ever After, you’ll find a number of common elements: The “First Steps” of newlyweds, The “Voice of Wisdom” from couples who are older and wiser, and Questions for Couples to work through both individually and together. As the authors, Toben and Joanne Heim say about this book, “Our hope is that by reading this book and answering some of the questions in it, you’ll learn about both yourself and your spouse and see the ways that God has created you to be partners in marriage. The best place to start learning these things is at the beginning – where you come from.” Buy this book now.

• MARRIAGE PARTNERSHIP MAGAZINE www.marriagepartnership.com. This is an American-based magazine dedicated to strengthening your marriage which helps you get a better picture of how to work together as a team. This EXCELLENT resource focuses on a variety of vital marital issues like communication, money, forgiveness, sex, and your spiritual life together. It’s written for both husbands and wives, comes out quarterly, and is published by Christianity Today International. We HIGHLY recommend it to all who can obtain it. They also have a free newsletter which you can sign up for at their very helpful web site. (You’ll need to have access to the internet in order to read the articles featured in this newsletter.) We subscribe to both the magazine and the newsletter and have found them to be very helpful to our own marriage and also in ministering to others who are married. Also, at this web site you can find magazine articles on file that you may find helpful to read. Just go to the search engine on the upper left hand corner of their site and put in the word, “newlywed” and hit enter. You’ll then be given numerous title choices of magazine articles to read on different subjects that will pertain to those who are newly married.

• MARRIAGE TAKES MORE THAN LOVE -by Jack and Carole Mayhall, published by NavPress, www.navpress.com. In this book, the authors share a multitude of things they’ve found that are vital to a good marriage—a solid foundation in God, open and honest communication, a clear definition of roles and responsibilities, exciting sex, and more. In a his-and-hers style, the Mayhalls show readers how to make the kind of choices in marriage that look out for the best interests of all three parties involved—you, your spouse, and God. (This book comes highly recommended as a favorite.) Buy this book now.

• STARTING YOUR MARRIAGE RIGHT: What You Need to Know and Do in the Early Years to Make it Last a Lifetime -by Dennis and Barbara Rainey, published by Thomas Nelson Publishers, www.thomasnelson.com. This book contains 52 brief but instructive lessons on how to stay married in today’s often-turbulent relational climate. In it, Dennis and Barbara draw from their own marriage and from their 29+ years in family ministry to present a view of the early years of marriage that is upbeat and optimistic without glossing over the very real potential problems.

Couples will learn how to: communicate more effectively, forgive each other, discover each other’s needs and learn how to meet them, keep God at the center of their relationship, handle in-laws, sex, money, and time pressures. In talking about this book, Dennis and Barbara Rainey say that “the most effective way to really ‘own’ the material is to recruit and spend time with a mentor couple who have been married 5 or more years.” You can then meet with them at various times throughout the year and discuss different chapters. As they say, “The key objective, though, is to learn from a couple who have already been where you are and where you’re headed. This could be your most important investment of time and energy to insure that your marriage will go the distance.” Buy this book now.

• THE FIRST FIVE YEARS OF MARRIAGE, is a Focus on the Family resource www.family.org, written by Focus on the Family Counselors, and is published by Tyndale House Publishers, www.tyndale.com. We highly recommend this great marriage guide—one of the best available! You’ll find that it’s practical, and yet easy to read, and is quite comprehensive in the variety of topics it covers—which could help your marriage greatly. These topics include number of articles on the subjects of: Getting to Know Each other, Expectations, Roles, Money, Communication, Sex, Resolving Conflict, Spiritual Issues, In-Laws, Children, and Sticking with It.

What’s also great about The First Five Years of Marriage is that it’s written by a team of experienced counselors who have dealt extensively with the issues covered. And all of them contribute a different slant on the expertise they’re able to share with the readers—so it’s like having a team of counselors helping you to adjust to your new life together! Plus this would make a great wedding or shower gift for anyone who is getting married! Everything within it is aimed to help its readers lay a solid foundation based on Biblical principles in a practical way. Buy this book now.

• THE MOST IMPORTANT YEAR IN A WOMAN’S LIFE/ THE MOST IMPORTANT YEAR IN A MAN’S LIFE -by Robert Wolgemuth, Bobbie Wolgemuth, Mark DeVries, and Susan DeVries, published by Zondervan, www.zondervan.com. It’s the winner of the Silver Medallion Book Award. The Wolgemuths (he’s an author and owner of a literary agency; she’s an author) and the DeVries (he’s a pastor and author; she assists him in premarital counseling and marriage retreats) offer here a two-in-one, flip-over-format volume aimed at newlywed Christian couples. One half is written for him and one half is written for her. Recognizing the success of their own marriages, the authors decided to share their experiences and advice with couples in that make-or-break first year of marriage, which they call the “wet cement” year. Both “books” have the same layout and cover topics such as money, sex and in-laws, but they cater, thematically and tonally, to the gender of their audience. Each book is neatly wrapped up with a “Meet in the Middle” section, which offers questions and exercises the husband and wife can work through together to continue to build upon the lessons they’ve just learned. Buy this book now.

• WHEN PRINCE CHARMING FALLS OFF HIS HORSE: Keeping the Happily Ever After in Your Marriage - by Jerry and Judy Schreur, published in 1997 by Chariot Victor Publishing. This book is fun, yet practical. Most young couples enter marriage with high hopes and aspirations. But reality says differently—and “mature” married couples will be the first to admit it. Prince Charming may be good-looking, but he snores, picks his teeth, and has a hundred other annoying habits. And, if Cinderella is perfectly honest, she’s not so perfect herself. As the authors remind us, “Falling in love is easy, getting married perhaps even easier, but staying happily married much more difficult.”

In this book you’ll learn ways to deal successfully with frustrations and disappointments of marriage, overcome the temptations to give up when the going gets tough, and stay committed and contented as a couple. Each chapter begins with a short humorous spin on the Cinderella story telling of her disappointments and perspectives on “normal” married life after the glorious fairy-tale courtship and wedding. Some of the chapter titles are: What Cinderella Really Wanted (Our Hunger for Love and Affection), Why Prince Charming is Always Riding in the Woods (Our Need to Rescue Others), When His Kiss No Longer Revives You (Facing the Reality of Boredom and Routine), The Empty Castle (Dealing with the Loss of Intimacy), The Prince Next Door (Understanding the Lure of Another), Cinderella’s Discovery (When He Wasn’t What You Thought He Would Be), Cinderella’s Longings (When He Doesn’t Fill the Hole in Your Soul), and more. We highly recommend this book. It’s a great read and is very insightful.

• WHEN THE HONEYMOON’S OVER - by Kathy Collard Miller and D. Larry Miller, published by Shaw. This book presents practical solutions to the often misunderstood (and highly romanticized) world of marriage. Does your spouse or significant person drive you crazy sometimes? This book will open your eyes with understanding and insight into why your spouse reacts the way they do. Don’t be in the dark! It gives you practical ideas for making a decision to love, even when your spouse is unlovely!