25 comments so far ↓

• 1 Tom // Oct 1, 2007 at 2:01 am

  Firstly I would ask the person planning to marry to pray for guidance in choosing the right partner. He/she must be mature and ready to marry and must have a good reason for marrying. I am saying this because most people these days are driven by pressure from either friends, parents, environment or sometimes material needs other than love (Godly).

  I would also advise him/her to know that one must be ready to give up himself and be ready to accommodate the other partner’s way of thinking. In fact there must be a give and take attitude for both partners to be attuned to one another. If you are aware of this then some unnecessary issues that brings unhappiness can be avoided.

  I have come to realize that sometimes parents in laws are also materials of unhappiness in most marriages so partners need to work out how, with all the respect, to handle the parents and in laws. I believe the order of responsibility for a happy marriage should be God first, husband and wife second and the rest come third.

• 2 Chantel // Oct 2, 2007 at 11:59 pm

  (South Africa) I would say that the couple should first and foremost trust God in everything, make God the centre of their universe, the foundation of their marriage, commit totally and wholly unto God before committing to each other. Comprise and understanding is also very important, listen more than speak. Marriage is not an easy road, it’s the world of two people becoming “one”. It may take time to adjust but once you do, it is beautiful. Respect each other, honour each other’s feelings, be faithful in all that you do, by doing this you are honouring God. And lastly “seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you”

• 3 Tambu // Oct 3, 2007 at 8:36 am

  (South Africa) If you are planning on getting married, I would strongly urge you to seek the heart of God in your choice of a partner (if you haven’t already done so). We give our lives to God and we let Him guide our decisions in everything we do, yet we often think that choosing a spouse is up to us because we are the ones that will need to live with him/her. Think of it this way: If God knows every hair on our head, surely he also knows what kind of person would make the best spouse for us? I urge you to honour God by seeking His approval and guidance before committing yourself in that beautiful covenant of marriage.

  Once you have sought God’s guidance, begin to pray into your future spouse’s life. Start holding him/her up in prayer, committing him/her to the Lord’s guidance and protection regularly. This will help to unlock God’s power in his/her life and it will also help to strengthen your relationship.

• 4 Joy // Oct 7, 2007 at 5:09 am

  (US) One of the best things my husband insisted that we do is continue with our Friday night date night. It was a commitment to each other we didn’t break for at least eight years into our marriage and our second child arrived. We took a break from our day to day responsiblities and just had fun together. It might have been a movie and dinner or it might have been a walk at my favorite park. It gave us something exciting to look forward to, and gave us wealth of good memories to draw from when times weren’t as good.

• 5 Sonia // Oct 8, 2007 at 5:41 am

  (Arizona, USA) I have been married for over 26 years and I just heard this last week from Pastors Paul and Patti Endrei (Church on the Rise out of the Cleveland, OH area, who were visiting our church). It made great sense. Pastor Paul said, “the Devil’s plan of attack changes ON YOUR WEDDING DAY!” Before your wedding day The Devil says: Have sex, it’s great, everybody does it, no one will know, it’s ok. Then you experience THE BIG DAY. From that day on, the Devil says: see it’s not that great, that other person would be better, why even bother - your spouse won’t be pleased, self-gratification is better, etc.

  Everyone knows that is not God’s plan. God says to keep the marriage bed holy. The 10 commandments say no fornicating, no adultery. Pastor Paul said: Sex in marriage is spiritual warfare! My interpretation: STOMP ON THE DEVIL’S HEAD BY NOT HAVING SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE then… STOMP ON THE DEVIL’S HEAD BY HAVING SEX AFTER MARRIAGE. We win because of Christ!

• 6 Penny // Oct 8, 2007 at 9:25 am

  (America) I would tell them before getting married they need to first seek Godly counsel. And to make sure that it is someone who has a passion for Marriage Ministry in particular or family values. I would encourage them to be aware of the unseen generational patterns that him or her may be bringing into the union, recognize that they are not each others enemies, but that they are made to compliment , enhance and help one another to reach their full potential. I would encourage them to pray together and to always remember to put the proper hedges around their marriage. Lastly, I believe it is a good idea to have a marriage ministry that you can always submit your marriage too.

  I lo………ve your ministry it provides soo-o-o-o-o much needed information. I have been truly blessed. My husband and I have a marriage ministry that is now growing. We have a desire to reach the masses, as well. Our marriage was healed 14 years ago and because of that we are commissioned to give out what God has given to us, restoration through the power of His word and His spirit and the word of our testimony. We have been married for 21 years. Thank you for your faithfulness and your work is not in vain!!!!

• 7 Pam // Oct 9, 2007 at 4:49 pm

  (South Carolina, USA). I believe that people get married today because they are “in love.” They get very tied up in the emotion of the relationship and believe they have, at long last, found “the one.” However, in my opinion, marriage is not about love. Yes, you must love your soon-to-be-spouse, but bigger than that - marriage is about commitment. The love will change over time as life events change and shape the individual. There will be times when you will “love” your spouse and there will be times when you’re not sure you even “like” your spouse. But through all of those times — the good and the bad — you stay committed to the spouse and to the success of the relationship. As you walk down the aisle, remember that although you’re saying “I do,” what you really mean is “I will.” If both partners are truly committed to the relationship, then love will surely follow.

• 8 Janet // Oct 10, 2007 at 5:45 am

  My sincere advice to anyone contemplating marriage is - “Don’t get married!!!” It’s not worth the trouble or the heartache and pain that it comes with, not to mention the added stress of running a home!

• 9 Doreen // Oct 11, 2007 at 11:51 pm

  (Bulawayo, Zimbabwe) l would tell them to continue dating each other just as they were doing. Have time to listen to what the other is saying; pray together even holding hands; attend couples meeting/parties/church services together; read the word of God together and discuss overall. Do most things together not allowing the other to feel left out/lonely.

• 10 Barbara // Oct 12, 2007 at 3:43 am

  From my little experience having been married for 8 years, marriage is a holy institution designed by God. Just as painful and wonderful as it is to deliver a baby, so it is in marriage. Full of love, sense of belonging, its warmth comfort and a season of pain and hurt. Intending to get married? It’s an issue that goes beyond the couple. It involves both families, friends from both sides and the community you live in.

  Before you say I DO! the two of you need to agree on how you will handle what comes with the institution; in-laws, work, recreation, budgets, income, different crisis, child bearing and rearing, and generally your expectations from each other and how to handle any breach of this. Firstly, love one another. When you say I DO, get committed and take your already agreed on responsibilities. Where there are misunderstandings, resolve them within the shortest possible time. If the two of you fail, as a couple, agree and identify who can help. With this full package, married should be enjoyed and not endured!