Comments on: The Dangers and Disappointments of Pornography http://www.marriagemissions.com/the-dangers-and-disappointments-of-pornography/ a Christian Marriage Website Sat, 21 Nov 2009 10:11:26 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.3 hourly 1 By: jose http://www.marriagemissions.com/the-dangers-and-disappointments-of-pornography/comment-page-1/#comment-5489 jose Sat, 21 Nov 2009 10:11:26 +0000 http://www.marriagemissions.net/the-dangers-and-disappointments-of-pornography/#comment-5489 (USA)  I was exposed to porn at a young age, it was not such a big deal at first. As a young adult I rarely got my hands on the stuff. It kinda grew over the years, at first I would go to my friends house and look at his collection, and I could only fantasize. Later my mother installed cable and when she would leave I would order porn. Sometime I would spend the night at my friends and we would watch videos. When I was of age to buy porn, my urge to see porn was so strong it was like a drug addiction, I literally seen my hands shake and felt my stomach turn as I got closer to the porn shop. Over time my fantasies grew out of control, fisting, doggy, creampie, anime, anal, orgy, cop, doctor, I was going too far and I knew it, but I could not stop. I would be up all night on the internet sometimes up to six hours at a time. My body was drained my eyes were sore, my mouth was dry, my skin was oily and worst of all I was ashamed and disappointed in myself. I needed help, but I was too ashamed to tell anyone, I felt like a monster, an outcast of society mostly because I did not want to be around anyone. Years later I was able to keep it under control, but once in awhile I would get full blown episodes. The day I got married I thought that everything would change, but it only amplified my struggle. I continued to commit adultery and I felt like I was hurting my relationship not only with my wife but with God. How could I be faithful to my heavenly father if I could not be faithful to my wife here on earth. I kept going, but I new that my time was running out. Something big was going to happen to my life, a sudden change that would cause me deep pain, but I could not stop. One night I was looking at one of my favorite stars, and when I was done I looked around me and thought about myself and my current state, I was disgusted at myself but why could I not find the self control... and then it clicked! I cannot do this by myself I need my Lord Jesus to save me because I knew that I was going to be damned to hell. Porn was apart of my life, I worshiped it and Satan had a tight grip and would never let me go. After I finished crying I prayed to the Lord to send me the Holy Spirit to help me conquer sin, but this time I prayed that I may receive the anger of the Holy Spirit, in that moment I felt a fiery anger stirring up inside me, I said I hate this pornography and all it stands for, just then I wanted to slay as many demons as I could for all the souls that they were tormenting. After I calmed down, I decided to do something about my sex portal, I searched for ways to block these sites and came across blogs that were there to help addicts like me, one site referred me to blue coat k9 web protection which blocked all porn sites. It was that step that I took to ensure my safety. The Lord Jesus snatched me from death but I also needed to fight along side him. I have read that the best way to help overcome my addiction was to tell someone about it, but could never do that, I already confessed my sins to my Lord. After reading the above comments, I felt that there was more than one way to confess my sin, I can tell others by telling my story and maybe my story could help someone along the way. There is only one way brothers and sisters and that is through Jesus Christ. I love you all... stand firm, life means war! (USA)  I was exposed to porn at a young age, it was not such a big deal at first. As a young adult I rarely got my hands on the stuff. It kinda grew over the years, at first I would go to my friends house and look at his collection, and I could only fantasize. Later my mother installed cable and when she would leave I would order porn. Sometime I would spend the night at my friends and we would watch videos. When I was of age to buy porn, my urge to see porn was so strong it was like a drug addiction, I literally seen my hands shake and felt my stomach turn as I got closer to the porn shop. Over time my fantasies grew out of control, fisting, doggy, creampie, anime, anal, orgy, cop, doctor, I was going too far and I knew it, but I could not stop. I would be up all night on the internet sometimes up to six hours at a time. My body was drained my eyes were sore, my mouth was dry, my skin was oily and worst of all I was ashamed and disappointed in myself. I needed help, but I was too ashamed to tell anyone, I felt like a monster, an outcast of society mostly because I did not want to be around anyone. Years later I was able to keep it under control, but once in awhile I would get full blown episodes. The day I got married I thought that everything would change, but it only amplified my struggle. I continued to commit adultery and I felt like I was hurting my relationship not only with my wife but with God. How could I be faithful to my heavenly father if I could not be faithful to my wife here on earth. I kept going, but I new that my time was running out. Something big was going to happen to my life, a sudden change that would cause me deep pain, but I could not stop. One night I was looking at one of my favorite stars, and when I was done I looked around me and thought about myself and my current state, I was disgusted at myself but why could I not find the self control… and then it clicked! I cannot do this by myself I need my Lord Jesus to save me because I knew that I was going to be damned to hell. Porn was apart of my life, I worshiped it and Satan had a tight grip and would never let me go. After I finished crying I prayed to the Lord to send me the Holy Spirit to help me conquer sin, but this time I prayed that I may receive the anger of the Holy Spirit, in that moment I felt a fiery anger stirring up inside me, I said I hate this pornography and all it stands for, just then I wanted to slay as many demons as I could for all the souls that they were tormenting. After I calmed down, I decided to do something about my sex portal, I searched for ways to block these sites and came across blogs that were there to help addicts like me, one site referred me to blue coat k9 web protection which blocked all porn sites. It was that step that I took to ensure my safety. The Lord Jesus snatched me from death but I also needed to fight along side him. I have read that the best way to help overcome my addiction was to tell someone about it, but could never do that, I already confessed my sins to my Lord. After reading the above comments, I felt that there was more than one way to confess my sin, I can tell others by telling my story and maybe my story could help someone along the way. There is only one way brothers and sisters and that is through Jesus Christ. I love you all… stand firm, life means war!

]]> By: Theo http://www.marriagemissions.com/the-dangers-and-disappointments-of-pornography/comment-page-1/#comment-5468 Theo Thu, 19 Nov 2009 14:02:48 +0000 http://www.marriagemissions.net/the-dangers-and-disappointments-of-pornography/#comment-5468 (SOUTH AFRICA)  ts, Thanx for the reply and thanx alot for that website. And thank you for your prayers. I've started the course and I do believe that there is hope through the grace of God. If there is someone else reading this post who's got a problem with porn I would like to urge you to stop immediately. I don't think you will ever understand the consequences of your actions fully. The place at which I am now in my life, feels like it must be a glimpse of hell. It's really no fun at all. But do know, that only the Lord can be your Saviour. (SOUTH AFRICA)  ts, Thanx for the reply and thanx alot for that website. And thank you for your prayers. I’ve started the course and I do believe that there is hope through the grace of God.

If there is someone else reading this post who’s got a problem with porn I would like to urge you to stop immediately. I don’t think you will ever understand the consequences of your actions fully. The place at which I am now in my life, feels like it must be a glimpse of hell. It’s really no fun at all. But do know, that only the Lord can be your Saviour.

]]> By: ts http://www.marriagemissions.com/the-dangers-and-disappointments-of-pornography/comment-page-1/#comment-5466 ts Thu, 19 Nov 2009 06:45:44 +0000 http://www.marriagemissions.net/the-dangers-and-disappointments-of-pornography/#comment-5466 (SOUTH AFRICA)  Dear Theo, My heart goes out to you and your family. I am a wife who had to deal with what your wife is going through at the moment. I know exactly how she feels. Please pray for the Lord to heal her as well and to deliver her from resentment, bitterness, rejection and anger she is feeling now. You are right there is hope for your marriage,and that hope is Jesus. He is the only one who can set you free from this bondage and restore your marriage. Please go to the website called <a href="http://www.settingcaptivesfree.com" rel="nofollow">www.settingcaptivesfree.com</a>. They are a ministry that can help you to be free from the bondage of ponography and they have a course for spouses of the people who are involved in pornography. Encourage your wife to do the spouse's course as well, but you have to take the first step. Trust in the Lord with your whole heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. Your family is in my prayers. (SOUTH AFRICA)  Dear Theo, My heart goes out to you and your family. I am a wife who had to deal with what your wife is going through at the moment. I know exactly how she feels. Please pray for the Lord to heal her as well and to deliver her from resentment, bitterness, rejection and anger she is feeling now.
You are right there is hope for your marriage,and that hope is Jesus. He is the only one who can set you free from this bondage and restore your marriage.

Please go to the website called http://www.settingcaptivesfree.com. They are a ministry that can help you to be free from the bondage of ponography and they have a course for spouses of the people who are involved in pornography.

Encourage your wife to do the spouse’s course as well, but you have to take the first step. Trust in the Lord with your whole heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. Your family is in my prayers.

]]> By: Theo http://www.marriagemissions.com/the-dangers-and-disappointments-of-pornography/comment-page-1/#comment-5459 Theo Wed, 18 Nov 2009 12:25:53 +0000 http://www.marriagemissions.net/the-dangers-and-disappointments-of-pornography/#comment-5459 (SOUTH AFRICA)  About 2 years ago my wife found out about my porn addiction. I did all the things listed as behaviors mentioned on this website beginning with denial and so forth. It ended about 14 months ago when my wife moved out with the kids and considered divorce. I realised that I have a problem and started to work on my problem. Everything was good untill about 3 months ago when I started again with pornography on my cell phone. I've been trying so hard but at the same time, I also didn't work on my spiritual side, so the devil got a foot in the door. This time around my wife has filed for a divorce. I realise that the only way to be freed from this horrible addiction is through the grace of the Lord alone. I got involved with pornography from the age of 12 when I've found some magazines in my fathers cupboard. I am sure of one thing and that is that I don't want my kids to go through the same things I am going through at the moment --the feelings of guilt for my actions and what it did to my wife. I know that I am the only one responsible for my actions and for the way my wife is feeling. I have started to read my Bible again and I'm constantly in prayer. I asked the Lord to help me overcome this addiction and to teach me how to be a man again to my wife and a father to my kids. If someone can please remember our family in your prayers. The last thing that I want is a divorce. I love my wife too much. The only thing she wants to talk about at the moment is how to reach a divorce settlement. I can understand that. I have decided that the devil had done enough damage in our relationship and no more. From now on it's only the Lord who must show the way. (SOUTH AFRICA)  About 2 years ago my wife found out about my porn addiction. I did all the things listed as behaviors mentioned on this website beginning with denial and so forth. It ended about 14 months ago when my wife moved out with the kids and considered divorce. I realised that I have a problem and started to work on my problem. Everything was good untill about 3 months ago when I started again with pornography on my cell phone. I’ve been trying so hard but at the same time, I also didn’t work on my spiritual side, so the devil got a foot in the door. This time around my wife has filed for a divorce. I realise that the only way to be freed from this horrible addiction is through the grace of the Lord alone.

I got involved with pornography from the age of 12 when I’ve found some magazines in my fathers cupboard. I am sure of one thing and that is that I don’t want my kids to go through the same things I am going through at the moment –the feelings of guilt for my actions and what it did to my wife. I know that I am the only one responsible for my actions and for the way my wife is feeling.

I have started to read my Bible again and I’m constantly in prayer. I asked the Lord to help me overcome this addiction and to teach me how to be a man again to my wife and a father to my kids.

If someone can please remember our family in your prayers. The last thing that I want is a divorce. I love my wife too much. The only thing she wants to talk about at the moment is how to reach a divorce settlement. I can understand that. I have decided that the devil had done enough damage in our relationship and no more. From now on it’s only the Lord who must show the way.

]]> By: Danish http://www.marriagemissions.com/the-dangers-and-disappointments-of-pornography/comment-page-1/#comment-4427 Danish Sun, 09 Aug 2009 10:17:10 +0000 http://www.marriagemissions.net/the-dangers-and-disappointments-of-pornography/#comment-4427 (PAKISTAN) Thanks for writing this article. It is very informative. Actually, in recent times, the social problems had been increased very high. Many people use new inventions for bad uses and for fulfilling their self pleasure. Pornography is not a new issue but now with the help of the internet it is very easily accessible. Many people think it is not a wrong thing but they don't know its dangers so I think it is very nice of you to present such informative material. (PAKISTAN) Thanks for writing this article. It is very informative. Actually, in recent times, the social problems had been increased very high. Many people use new inventions for bad uses and for fulfilling their self pleasure. Pornography is not a new issue but now with the help of the internet it is very easily accessible. Many people think it is not a wrong thing but they don’t know its dangers so I think it is very nice of you to present such informative material.

]]> By: Brian http://www.marriagemissions.com/the-dangers-and-disappointments-of-pornography/comment-page-1/#comment-732 Brian Thu, 24 Apr 2008 02:52:45 +0000 http://www.marriagemissions.net/the-dangers-and-disappointments-of-pornography/#comment-732 (USA) I've been free of pornography for a little over 2 months now. This is not the same thing as not having viewed pornography for 2 months though! I've gone that long and longer plenty of times over the years but kept returning over and over. How many times have you been looking at pornography and have told yourself "I don't want to do this"? I've done that so often, and even said those words out loud as I was looking at porn on the internet. How many times have you resolved to quit, and have had a few days of success, but then find yourself viewing porn again? How much do you feel like a failure because you don't have enough self-control to overcome this on your own? Its a vicious cycle that continues until it is broken. For those of us that are the independent type, this is the hardest thing to overcome because it simply can't be done without outside help. I'm sure for so many people, the only thing worse than being involved in pornography, is letting someone else find out. It's the only way out though. The moment you tell someone; a close friend, your pastor, anyone you trust, that cycle is broken! I actually physically felt something when I finally did this. It was like my heart leapt or something. I don't know how to explain it, but it was the first step of what has been a wonderful 2 months of glorious freedom! The last night I ever viewed pornography, I was at my end. I searched for help with this on-line and discovered www.settingcaptivesfree.com. I highly recommend the course they offer. It is free, although supported through donations. Also, they provide a mentor that will hold you accountable to get through this 60 day course. I didn't know what it would mean to be free from this. I knew I didn't like pornography, but I had no idea the affect freedom from it would have on my marriage, on my self-confidence, and even how I view sex with my wife. It used to be something I enjoyed of course, but I'm discovering now God's real plan for sex. It's way different that viewing porn would have you believe! I could go on for hours, but I encourage you, if you're trapped in pornography, try the course at www.settingcaptivesfree.com. (USA) I’ve been free of pornography for a little over 2 months now. This is not the same thing as not having viewed pornography for 2 months though! I’ve gone that long and longer plenty of times over the years but kept returning over and over.

How many times have you been looking at pornography and have told yourself "I don’t want to do this"? I’ve done that so often, and even said those words out loud as I was looking at porn on the internet. How many times have you resolved to quit, and have had a few days of success, but then find yourself viewing porn again? How much do you feel like a failure because you don’t have enough self-control to overcome this on your own? Its a vicious cycle that continues until it is broken.

For those of us that are the independent type, this is the hardest thing to overcome because it simply can’t be done without outside help. I’m sure for so many people, the only thing worse than being involved in pornography, is letting someone else find out. It’s the only way out though. The moment you tell someone; a close friend, your pastor, anyone you trust, that cycle is broken! I actually physically felt something when I finally did this. It was like my heart leapt or something. I don’t know how to explain it, but it was the first step of what has been a wonderful 2 months of glorious freedom!

The last night I ever viewed pornography, I was at my end. I searched for help with this on-line and discovered http://www.settingcaptivesfree.com. I highly recommend the course they offer. It is free, although supported through donations. Also, they provide a mentor that will hold you accountable to get through this 60 day course.

I didn’t know what it would mean to be free from this. I knew I didn’t like pornography, but I had no idea the affect freedom from it would have on my marriage, on my self-confidence, and even how I view sex with my wife. It used to be something I enjoyed of course, but I’m discovering now God’s real plan for sex. It’s way different that viewing porn would have you believe!

I could go on for hours, but I encourage you, if you’re trapped in pornography, try the course at http://www.settingcaptivesfree.com.

]]>