If it is family and friends that are making the demands for a more “elaborate wedding” then have them foot the bill and do the planning so you and your fiance can concentrate upon the upcoming marriage instead. If they don’t pay, they shouldn’t make the demands.

Also, just so you know, we have an article titled “Tips for Tying the Marital Knot” that might give you a few tips for making a wedding easier on the budget. In the future, we hope to have more articles posted on this subject. But for now, pray, consider your finances, and go with the leading that God gives you… NOT the pressure of those around you. Years down the line, people will probably forget that you didn’t have an elaborate wedding. But if you do things their way and you go into debt for this, in the years to come, you will still resentfully be paying the bills and will feel the pressure.

Our youngest son (who is 34), just got married this past Spring and they had a lovely wedding — very simple, where they married in the court yard of their present home, with a minister and immediate family present. It was very simple, yet very nice with almost NO pressure. And you know what? They’re just as married as they would have been if they would have had an elaborate wedding. And they don’t have looming wedding bills to pay for — which is great!

I encourage you to have your simple wedding and peace instead of an elaborate one with stress and bills. Ask God to show you how. This will be the beginning of many, many tough choices you will have to make to choose each other, rather than choosing to please those around you. Choose God’s way, choose each other, and let others know that it is YOUR marriage, not theirs, that you are tending to.

Our small group put things together and we just served cake and punch after the service, took some photos and vacated the church by 4pm.

The bride and groom have the ultimate say, because if they are not there, there is no wedding. So if mom and dad are getting out of hand, just say no, remind them, respectfully, that it’s their wedding day, not mom’s, not dad’s, and go from there.

If we spent more than $1000 on our 21st century wedding, I’d be shocked. It wasn’t that we couldn’t afford to, we could. We simply spent our resources on pre-marital counseling and invested in the marriage, not the wedding.

It can be done, contrary to what the article suggests.