The Romance Factor: When Busyness Gets In The Way
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Has life between you and your spouse become so “matter-of-fact” that you’ve almost forgotten what romance looked like in your relationship? Has it begun to look like a distant memory?
We know that a lot of women read romance novels, so they know what it can look like between two other people (even in an over-inflated, artificial way), but what about your own marital relationship?
“Do you remember when you and your spouse were dating? When dinner was consumed to the strains of soft music instead of to Sponge Bob? In the day to day busyness of married life, romance is often the first thing to go. Yet the ‘Romance Factor’ can have a high impact on the success of your marriage.
“The Romance Factor encompasses much more than just sex. It invokes the five senses: sight, smell, sound, taste, and touch. It’s the emotional, spiritual, and physical connection between a husband and wife.”
Do you want that connection again— to put the romance factor back into your own marriage? It’s true that:
“Passion in your marriage is likely to fizzle unless you proactively nurture it. Don’t stop pursuing the love of your life after you marry.” -Whitney Hopler
To TRULY love your spouse as you promised to do on your wedding day, you need to make a concerted effort to be pro-active!
“Create an environment where love can flourish. Create the time and space, as well as the intentionality, for love to blossom.” -Dr. David B. Hawkins (from Crosswalk.com article, New Decade Renewed Marriage)
Twanda Smith, who is a romantic events planner and consultant, has a few ideas that can help arouse the five senses within you and your spouse that might help in some way to re-connected you romantically.
You can read about it by clicking on the link provided below to an article posted on the Kyria.com web site:
And then arrow back to read another related article which addresses trying to be romantic when you’re just too tired (and other related factors). You can do so by clicking onto the FamilyLife.com web site link below:
If you have additional tips you can share to help others in this area of marriage, or you want to share requests for prayer and/or ask others for advice, please “Join the Discussion” by adding your comments below.
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(U.S.) This is the story of my life or so I hope it is the reason things have cooled off so drastically. My husband was always very affectionate toward me and we had a very healthy sex life as well. He is working a lot of overtime and he is not as young as he used to be so I understand the lack of interest in sex no problem because that is not what our marriage is about after 27 years.
But he never shows me any affection and that’s what concerns me. He doesn’t hug me, kiss me, hold my hand, call me affectionate names, nothing. The worse part is when I initiate a hug it is only returned half heartedly and he has even pushed me away before. We are getting along great, like the best of friends but I feel more like his buddy than his wife. I am afraid he has lost his feelings for me that he loves me but is no longer in love with me or he is no longer attracted to me. I just don’t know.
I keep telling myself it’s just the job but in the past no matter what we were dealing with as a couple I always felt his love. But I just don’t feel it. I have been dealing with this for 2 years and it will go away for awhile or I just quit thinking about it but these feelings always come back like a haunting. I still love my husband very much and miss his companionship, affection, and the romance we once shared.