One of the original purposes of marriage as God intended it in Eden was to reflect His image. That means marriage is about something bigger than two people. Marriage is one of God’s primary means of speaking to the world, and the world takes notice when a man truly loves his wife the way Christ loves His church. (Al Janssen)

This month in the Focus on the Family magazine there’s an article entitled, “Lasting Love” (by Susan Graham Mathis) that features Christian music artist Michael W. Smith and his wife Debbie (who have recently celebrated their 22nd wedding anniversary) that reflects the point made in the above statement. “The world takes notice when a man truly loves his wife the way Christ loves the church.”

We sure took notice as we read the article — and we’d like to share some of the statements that were made that seems to especially “reflect” the image God intends for us all to see.

On the subject of having a SACRIFICIAL MARRIAGE (as we all should have so we reflect the love of Christ) it reads:

Part of their strategy in raising a family that is healthy is being willing to sacrifice. As Michael said, “Debbie’s been unselfish since day one, and she has graciously released me to do what God wants me to do. A big part of marriage is giving, sacrificing and being unselfish.”

He goes on to say, “My kids see the way I treat Deb and how we interact, and they watch us with other people. They also see I’ve turned down opportunities in order to make family my priority.” Debbie goes on to say, “If Michael needs or wants something [I try to find] a way to serve him. God uses sacrificial love in marriage to shape us into being more like Him—so we forget our agenda and follow His. It’s interesting how he uses marriage to build character.

On the subject of PROTECTING THEIR MARRIAGE (as we all should do) it reads:

As Michael and Debbie strive to be unselfish and giving in their marriage, they also find themselves protecting their home from enemies that might come against it. “You can’t put a price tag on family. As a celebrity, fighting for my marriage and family is always a challenge,” Michael says. “Fortunately, I work with a good team, and they all know that I don’t want anything to get in the way of my family.

“I protect my marriage by setting up certain parameters, and I don’t go outside those parameters. I don’t let myself get into compromising situations. And I have friends who keep me accountable and grounded.”

“I credit the Lord with keeping us strong,” Debbie says. “One key is having people pray for you, people who know what’s going on in your life.”

The Smiths have been in a prayer group with the same seven couples for 14 years. The couples hold each other accountable; as a result each of their marriages is strong.

On the subject of being ROLE MODELS (which we all are to be — it’s for others to observe God through) the article notes:

The Smiths guard their relationship not only to portray God’s purpose, but also to model a good marriage to their children. “I’d like my kids to see I’m a God-fearing man who loves his wife and kids well,” Michael says. “The way Deb and I have treated each other over the years speaks louder than words.”

“When there’s tension in the air, our kids know it,” Debbie says. “So after we’ve resolved things, they need to know that everything’s fine, that we worked it out and forgave each other.”

“The kids observe our priorities, what drives us and what makes us tick,” Michael says. “I hope they’re seining we’ve not only fallen in love with each other more and more over the years, but that we’ve also taken opportunities to pour our lives into other people.”

Debbie says, “They know that family is central to everything we do, and Michael and I are committed to each other. Our children see us hug all the time, and it rubs off on them. It’s healthy to let them know that no matter how long we’ve been married, we’re still crazy about each other.” (AMEN!)

The article closes by saying, “As the Smith walk in covenant together, they desire to show the next generation God’s design for marriage.” I love the quote from St. Francis of Assisi, “Preach always, but if necessary use words,” Michael says.

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We couldn’t have said any of this better ourselves! We pray God will speak to us all through the witness of what Michael and his wife Debbie have said, and are living out as a mission of love to God and all those who observe their lives. (The above article can be read in it’s entirety in the February/March 2004 Focus on the Family Magazine which can be obtained by writing to www.family.org.)They also have several other very inspiring articles you may find of interest.) In closing, we’d like to leave you with the following: 

“God offers us meaning in marriage—first by showing us His marriage; second by inviting us to follow His model, offering us the Holy Spirit as our counselor; and finally, by assuring us that those who faithfully follow His plan will receive God’s approval.” (From: The Marriage Masterpiece by Al Jansen)

The important point is that we need to faithfully follow His plan for marriage. Psalm 33:11 reminds us too, “But the plans of the Lord stand firm forever, the purpose of His heart through the generations.”

Our love to you as together we work to make our marriages reflect the love of Christ!

Steve and Cindy Wright